So here we are 3 weeks later....
Now that the madness has subsided some I think the reality of the fire has truly set in for us all. I am now situated in an apartment with Courtney, my oldest. While AJ, Lyric and Alexis are all living with Julie in a house a couple of miles away. It has been nearly 2 years now since we all started living under one roof again. This unique family arrangement is once again being tested. While I worry about the kids the most, it creates unique challenges for us parents. Now when I have my assigned time with the kids I have to stay in the house with them and Julie vacates during that time. During the week I stay until bedtime and get them all settled and then I return to my apartment and Julie manages the overnights and mornings. Then in the morning Julie drops at least on, two or three of them off at my apartment for me to deliver them to their daily activities. Obviously this is less than ideal arrangement, but I have come to realized many two household families have schedules and routines that are similar and less than convenient. Maybe we are not so unique after all.
The emotional toll it has taken on us all finally started becoming more evident. Our emotions are frayed and we tend to be short tempered with each other, parent and kids alike. I can honestly say that I don't think the fire ever completely totally leaves my mind. It is always floating around somewhere in the background, especially as we continue to manage details of the clean out and clean up on a nearly daily basis. I get annoyed anytime some issue or detail stops or delays progress on the house. In my mind, I keep playing with this six month time line and we tell the kids we are hoping to be home by Christmas. Yet at the same time I see the chaos and devastation and think to myself really???? Is it a false expectation to have that hope. Are we going to be disappointed. Will we not be home for Christmas? I know maybe being home for Christmas is not a big deal, but it would definitely add to the feeling and sentiment that Christmas brings.
My youngest son, AJ, age 7 is struggling and experiencing his sadness through a lot of anger. Little things are setting him off and he is just not his normal self. He is broody and sullen and the timing coincides with the fire and the end of school. Two major events that have broken his routine and schedule. Two hotels and one temporary home later and we are hoping the consistency that we are now employing three weeks later will help his sadness and anger ease. I am sad that this has had such a profound impact on him, he is even resisting affection and cuddling from us and that really makes me sad. Good news he is now sleeping his own bed full time which is something we have prayed for several years. Woohoo
Alexis has had nightmares since the first night, but they have finally started to ease as we have gotten more settled. Lyric seems a bit more argumentative than usual and is having a hard time accepting the fact that she can not have her new room right now. She has this grand design for the room of her dreams involving red, pink, purple and brown! That color scheme has not been approved by management as of yet.
One apartment and one house later and we trying to find our new normal. I just hope we find it before we have to relocate back to the house when it is complete. That we can plan for and prepare, this one left no room for preparation or planning and was totally on the fly and put the parents in a tail spin for a week or two.
I did order a new mattress from Amazon and a bed frame to go with it. The mattress came in today and it was all rolled up. It was crazy and has to lay flat for 24 hours before use. It is crazy, but I have heard nothing but positive reports. Courtney will be sleeping on it for now and we will see what comments he has to offer.
As I have learned 21 days is enough time for a lot to happen! It is a bit surreal but I can still see the huge billows of smoke pouring out of the house that evening! It clearly an image etched into my mind for the rest of my life! Looking forward to some new good memories to be etched into my mind!
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